Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize