I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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