genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
