were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Randomize
