I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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