The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize