escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Is it because I queefed?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
