the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize