Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Your mouth is God's brothel.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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