I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize
