Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Randomize
