Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
