you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
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