HIV tests are more positive than that guy
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
