Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
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