Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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