Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize