Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Randomize
