Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Randomize