Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
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I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
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