that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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