I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
