SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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