Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
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