I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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