im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
