Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
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