No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
