that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
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We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
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I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
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