it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Everyone says I win the strip club
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Randomize