epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Im just a social blackout drinker.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
