If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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