everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize