Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
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