guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
