You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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