ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
Randomize