Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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