Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.