turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I yelled at your uterus for you.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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