Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize