when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
