Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
