Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
