we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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