im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
