The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize