she was so not down for the gang bang
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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