how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
