I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
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i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
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I've ID'd the nipple biter.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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